Twenty Ten

So here it is huh? The end of 2010. Seems fast, but when I think about it, I need a few seconds to remember where I was and what I was doing at the beginning of this year. Feels like 2 worlds now.

I guess sometimes changes occur so subtly and gradually that it's only when you sit in front of your laptop typing a blog post that you start to think back about them.

Argh I don't want to do a whole long piece about how good or miserable my year was. I am just grateful for the helping hands and face smacks in times of difficulty.

And I will forever remember this year as the year I found something I always wanted and needed, a certainty. I'm glad I found it at the beginning of the year, making my whole year feel "lighter" than it actually is. Merci.

My 2010 ends on a simple note - purely sitting on a couch and listening to Music, and it's all that I need to feel happy.

Happy 2011. 要健康，快樂。 :)

fan/

2010都快結束了，過往還像鬼魂纏著我。這個感覺不陌生。

很怕很怕那些噓寒問暖的人，也不懂怎麽面對這個過去。還有以後。

之前告訴自己等，不爭氣，現在又要重新熬了。

還是在和過往保持距離，也不懂維持多久后，每個人都會開始忘記我了。

或許那時，我可以如願擺脫以往，但也可能成爲沒有過去的人。

每次這樣給人說、被提醒，我也不好受！我也不想的，我真的不想依賴，可是我沒有出口了。但真的這樣嗎？現在想也太遲了。路選了就繼續走。

之前設定了一些規則，現在該設些其他的來補充。不常來了。雖然人不能活在自己的世界裡，但活在最相似的國度也不錯，雖然或許有一天會只剩下自己。

而且沒有人明白現在的我。我有想過告訴他們，可是我的所謂理由精神支柱正面影響，都只會被他們眼中自形的霧掩蓋而壓縮成成迷揮霍。所以冷靜思考兩分鐘，我發現只有繼續這樣做我想做的事，雖然每次為自己解釋辯護很傷神。

可能正能量暫時用光的感覺是這樣，很累。可是有時想想又好像在無病呻吟。

說點有趣的：12月31號我有個小小大計划，就是嘗試拯救我垂死的電話。失敗或成功，都可以當作從新來過。

After exams

Dream dream dream, what did I just dream?

1st: Somehow was with Ellen, singing Over the Rainbow, harmonising for each other, in somewhere like a lecture, and we were sort of forced to sing... Don't ask me why it was Ellen not Eman, I dunno how my mind works.

2nd: I had a new smartphone, not an I4 surprisingly. It had no brand but was something like very techy and modern. The environment was like my villa (ya I had a villa) was invaded by intruders, and we were trying to evade them and fight back. Then  ____ (I dunno what, memory lapse). Then suddenly it changed to Mum giving me a GF-1 for my birthday. While quite happy to receive a camera, in my mind I was ungrateful (as always) and thought: Mum, I told you I don't want a Micro Four-Thirds anymore I want a full DSLR, aiya you never listen. And and and, now the GF-2 is out, GF-1 outdated la.

Hahahahahaha, suuuuuper ungrateful!!!

Ahh, why so many dreams? Coz now I'll automatically wake up after 4hours, so I haven't slept past 4hours for 3 weeks already. Torture ar!!!! Keep waking up, then i'll guess the time (which is usually just the time I slept +4hours) and I'm spot-on correct.

Oh no I'm old. Old people sleep less, known fact.

OK, nothing interesting to write anymore. End. (sharp cut, haha)

Finally I have some time to rest, and feel happy.

Finally here. At least one out of two. See the size compared to my chapstick? :D

Inside.

Then this. My Christmas present. So efficient.

***

My window sill is now my fridge. Freezzze...

很悶很悶很悶很悶很煩很悶很煩很悶很悶很無聊所以想說...

我愛你！

太多空間了（Facebook, Plurk, Weibo, Twitter, Blog, Blog）反而不知道要在哪裡亂寫一通。

就回來完全屬於自己的這裡，也不會干擾別人。